hCG Activator Day One and Two

Its March 27th, 2011, My weight is 245 lbs. I had my hCG Activator from GNC  in hand and my grocery list ready for the food. I was suppose to load for 2 days? Really? I had to look at my make up for oils? I had to survive off of 500 calories a day? What was I getting myself into? M husband admitted later that he was afraid that if I couldn't eat I would kill someone. I guess I'm crabby when I'm hungry. I read read and read the instructions repeatedly, I was so worried that I would mess up for some reason. It was a very limited menu and pretty simple so my chances of screwing up was low.  I followed the instructions and I loaded for 2 days and I ate whatever I wanted. I really had a hard time eating so much as I had no appetite from the pills and I have always restricted myself from the foods that I loved and I just got used to not eating much.
By the end of the 2 days my weight climbed to 248 lbs. OMG!I was freaking out and I prayed that this program  worked.  It said in the directions that this could happen, the weight will come off. I shopped, cooked and prepped my food for the week ahead. I planned it all on my my calendar day by day, I set an alarm on my phone at 7:00 am and 3:00 pm to remind me to take my pills, I bought Vitamin D and a good Multi vitamin to make up for the lack of Dairy, I planned everything for 30 days. Every birthday party, holiday or school function. I was NOT going to have an excuse to mess this up.  And most importantly I used my www.www.fatsecret.com to record all my weight daily and my journal to write down how I was feeling, if I had any side effects or problems it would all be in my journal.

I kept this journal my by bed and the scale in the closet with a pen close by.
I absolutely positively hate this picture but it was the only one I had for a before picture. I really avoided the camera feeling so uncomfortable in my skin.  Its hard to see this again but I really wanted to show that's it possible to be successful with the right program and the right support.
What I really hate about this picture is that my son took this picture  He was 7 at the time and had to stand on a chair to take it. I felt so awful looking at it and as I looked into his eyes I wondered what he thought of me for having him take the picture. Just as my eyes filled up with tears he stepped off the chair and told me that I was a beautiful mommy. I was speechless, I gave him the biggest hug ever and said thank you dear, I love you too.
What a tough day!!!