I saw a commercial for Baratric surgery on TV and thought maybe this was a possibility. I was really nervous to call but I sucked it up and called.
It was an evening appointment and I went after work. I remember exactly what I wore that day almost 3 years ago like it was yesterday. I had been down to the clinic before when I visited the nutritionist a few months earlier. This time the room had long tables with folding chairs in a lecture setting. I was early so I could get a seat and I had no idea of what to expect. They had information folders on the table with pens to take notes about a dozen were laid out. I was the first person in the room and I got a sudden fear. What if someone I knew came in? What would they think? As people began to make their way into the room I started to feel really foolish for this decision. It was clearly a life or death situation for these folks and I felt horrible for wasting anyone's time. One women came in a wheel chair and others had assistance and oxygen tanks. What was I thinking, I felt so selfish. I was afraid to leave because I would get noticed so I sat quietly wishing I would vanish into the corner. I sat through the hour long presentation as the professionals talked about the different types of procedures available. It was all presented very well and the care that would be provided. At the end they had us each figure out a BMI chart and a check list of any medical problems. High blood pressure, diabetes, hypertension, etc. I filled out the chart, no blood pressure problems, no diabetes no hypertension. All clean. When I got to the weight part I could feel my breathe getting shallower and quicker. I was 7 lbs short of the the allowable weight. One comment sticks out in my mind. The nice lady that was helping me fill out my chart said that I was only 7 lbs short to qualify and that I needed to gain weight. I don't know if she was joking or serious but I will never forget it. I politely said thank you for you time, but no thank you, gaining weight was not an option. I quietly excused myself walked out to my car and sat there in the quiet for a few minutes, replaying the whole experience in my head. While it was not a pleasant experience I did realize that I was not a bad off as I had worked up in my own mind. I had my health my family and friends. I was still in charge of my own destiny. I just needed to find the right combination.
