Chicken Dinner ?

After we evicted the chickens out of the pole barn we had 2 roosters that needed to be dealt with. First thing out of the Chicken lady's mouth "Rooster for Dinner?"  The look on my face was priceless as she headed for an ax.

She would tell me childhood stories of her mother breaking the necks of chickens. All those stories came flooding back to me in that instant. At that moment I thought, what does she want me to do?? I've lived up here all of my childhood life, but I live in the city and buy my chicken at the store. I was looking for a quick out like maybe could go rake the yard or pick up sticks.

Well, I wasn't as uncomfortable as I thought I would be. After this, I feel I'm ready for a zombie apocalypse. I can kill my own food if I had to.

Not sure if my readers are ready for a picture of a headless chicken but its true. The body still moves without the head attached. It didn't run or walk around but it was still very much active for a few minutes beyond decapitation.

She cleaned the birds in the kitchen sink and I get a question that I didn't  expect to hear. "Have you ever seen Chicken balls? Um, well no. Never crossed my mind to think about chicken balls.

Since we are learning things here, chickens have some pretty big balls. Ranks right up there with chicken earlobes and wondering if they have them.

I googled it and there's a lot of recipes out there for the balls delicacy. Well, the dogs enjoyed them and as enjoyed our chicken in a roasting bag.

The Rooster or the Snapping Turtle?

One constant battle when you have chickens is the wildlife things it free snack time. The chicken lady has countless stories of coyote, fox, cougar , racoons opossums and even a wp;f. Now include a snapping Turtle. This isn't the actual picture of the one she found, but we wanted to show you that they are not nice and will eat anything it can get a hold of. Ask the Chicken Lady for her turtle stew recipe.

Here is a story right from the Chicken Lady herself. I went out to collect eggs from the chicken coop and noticed that one of the roosters was way back behind the coop by the fence. The rooster seemed really agitated s he was alone and walking back and forth in a semi circle. It looked strange so I went back there to see what was going on. To my surprise, he was not alone!

He had a snapping turtle about the size of a dinner plate against the fence. more than likely he was keeping the ladies away. I picked it up by the tail and threw it over the fence into the swamp. It must have been hibernating in my pond and now that the weather is getting warmer it came out and crawled up the hill. But it could not get through the fence to get out of the yard.

Who says that roosters don't watch out for their ladies!

Do you have "Courage"

Every story needs a personality. The Chicken Lady's "pets" are no different.  Like people, our furry or feathery friends have their own stories.

To show you that the Chicken Lady actually exists we capture the story of Courage.

Courage's mother was a small brown Bantam chicken that roosted in the apple tree at night. Because it's what chickens do. In late fall of 2014, she hatched out a nest of baby chicks under my porch. There were 7 of them and they were tiny. Then it snowed and she decided that they should all go up into the apple tree to sleep. But the babies were only a few days old. When it got dark she took them all through the snow to the apple tree. She flew up into the tree, but the babies could not fly. they were not even the size of a golf ball.

I was in bed and heard the babies peeping loudly, so I went out in my nightgown to see what was going on. There they were standing in snow that was deeper then they were tall. Mama was up in the tree calling them to come up with no success.

I put on my boots and started running around to catch them. Mind you, it's snowing and I'm in my nightgown. Unfortunately, 2 had already died from being cold and wet. I caught the remaining 5 and took them into the pole barn and put them in a cat carrier. Mama flew down, went into the barn and got in the carrier with her young and that started it all..

Mama and babies stayed in the barn all winter. The babies grew but never got very big. I think they lacked the sunshine to help them grow. They were about the size of a pigeon. They had never been out of the barn for the first 7 months of their life and have never seen the sun. When it warmed up, Mama started going back up in the tree. The babies still could not fly that high. They would stay under the tree until dark then all 5 went back into the barn to their bed in the cat carrier.

When summer finally arrived they would come out of the barn and walk around the yard with the other chickens, but at night they went back in. Courage never would go very far from the barn, she stayed by herself most of the time.

It turned out there were 3 boys & 2 girls. The boys remained very tiny and were only about 1/2 the size of a regular Bantam rooster, but they learned how to fly. By the fall of 2015 they could fly up to the rafters in the barn. All but Courage. She still slept in the cat carrier. She was the only one that grew to be white with speckles, all the others were dark.

One by one they started to fly up into the apple tree with Mama. Then Mama was gone. I think an owl got her. The young ones went back to the safety of the barn rafters. But in the spring when they came out again they started to sleep back in the apple tree with other chickens. One by one they disappeared. Hawks, Owls or whatever.

Courage had never gone to sleep in the tree and always stayed in the barn by herself. There is a foot problem with the breed of Bantam that she is. She has feathers on her ankles and grows calluses on her feet that cause her toes to get hard and sort of grow together with parts of them breaking off, making it hard to walk. Her nails get very long and I have to keep them trimmed and peel off the callus often. She has already lost part of one toe.

Josh my grandson named her Courage because she had the courage to survive alone after all her hardships.

Because I left the pole barn garage door open a little at the bottom for Courage, other chickens decided that was a good place to sleep too. The barn got the look like a chicken coop inside so, this spring all of the chickens that had taken up residence in the barn except for Courage were removed to chickens coops. But the first night after eviction from the barn they left the coops and all are now in the apple tree at night including Courage who has learned to fly up just like all the other chickens. I opened the barn door for her in the morning and she left it. She is now the first one to fly up into the tree every night.
More to come on the eviction story, stay tuned.

Chicken Population

With all the roaming (free Range) chickens hanging around the porch it was clear that they needed a home.  Living in the country you also have to be smart. You might need something later, like 30 years later but, later. Growing up I could not believe all the stuff that my mom held on to, I figured she was just a pack rat. Now I get it and I'm guilty.
She pulled all the materials needed to make a chicken coop and next thingI know BOOM a new apartment complex.

I was wondering when I tried to call and she did not answer. I had thoughts in my head of all her chickens eating her if she fell down.

She put it in a spot that is close to the porch but yet off into the wood line just a bit. Hopefully, it gives them a place to stay warm and lay eggs instead of laying in strange places like the recycle bin, flowerbeds, couch, table, or in a bucket.

We walk around a lot looking at flowers on the property and you never know when you might run across a nest of eggs.

The problem with having free range is the roaming critters that come out of the woods for a dinner snack. The beautiful part of country living is also hardships of the landscape and its wild life.  She has visits of fox, coyote owls, hawks,and bobcats. She has bears too, but haven't seen them (so far.)

Drives her a bit crazy when the chickens start screaming and running frantic. It's like a scene from the Chicken little movie  and the sky is falling. She runs out with her 22 looking for something to shoot. Most of the time, she too late but she has caught glimpses of predators, and we see them on the trail cameras.

Reminds me, I will have to share the story of me pulling a Tom Beringer in the movie Sniper.
 

It's no FEET for a Chicken

Weather in Michigan can flip on a dime. It was a warmish winter day up with The Chicken Lady and she encountered a strange situation.  She has a couple of coops for her broods to call home. She has her big girls in the main coop and the smaller Bantam chickens in their coop.

But, she also has a few chickens that were either born on the porch or close by that have decided to move in and perch in random places

She has made little dwellings for them to call home. She uses old cat cages or crates, old little boxes in hopes they would use. Some use the recycle bin or even a bucket.

A few of them also perch on the back of the couch. Looking in at us watching TV. I can't but feel weird with that one.

She used to take the time to pick them up and carry them to the coop when it got dark, but it was cold and she felt sorry for them. Plus it keeps them out of harms way when wild critters are wondering around.
Good luck sneaking by a chicken to get in the house.They're not very quiet. Just like any other night, everyone went to bed in their perspective homes. She shuts the door to the hen house and calls it a night.

Each morning routinely, my mother gets up to open the coop doors. She bundles up runs out opens the little door and then usually goes back to bed. This particular winter day she got up, put on her flannel over her nightgown, lit a cigarette, poured a cup of coffee into a large mug that looks like a pair of denim jeans, puts on her boots and wanders outside to begin the process. Fills the cat dish sitting on top of the grill. A few chickens are huddled around the cat food container knowing that she'll fill it up and maybe get lucky with some droppings. A few scramble off the couch  towards her but one little brown hen seemed to jump but squawked and never got down. Flapping her wings, noisy and confused.  At first, mom thought that she was caught on the blanket but, soon realized that she was froze to the couch in a mountain of ice.  Her little chicken legs were stuck.  The day had been warm enough but at night the temps dropped causing the drip to harden throughout the night.

How to thaw a live chicken. The concern was to not break toes or her little chicken legs.
The Chicken Lady took a drink of her lukewarm coffee, took a drag off her cigarette and headed back into the house for a moment.
She came back with a blow dryer and an extension cord and proceeded to melt the ice around the chicken legs.
She was able to free the chicken but wasn't sure if the toes would make it. Later they did turn black and fall off but she survived. Going on her second winter with peg legs she lives on the porch chair that's nice and soft. And when she does wonder around she stays on the carpet, rugs or grass as much as possible. Maybe I will get her a little pirate costume for Halloween.

Chickens at Random

A few of the tiny velociraptors or chickens like to hang out on the couch.   The chicken lady has several different breeds chickens. She has laying hens, which are the ladies that are breeds like Leg horns, Rhode Island Reds, Orpingtons and the list goes on. They are in a lovely gated community complete with pond, trees, and plenty of bugs. She also has free range Bantam chickens that run all over the yard.  They are just like regular chickens but much smaller in size.

It's really cool to see all the different sizes, shapes and shapes of eggs. The shell color is pretty cool when you can make a dozen with brown, blue, green, speckled and white eggs. We call them a rainbow pack. Makes you wonder about the commercial industry. How many eggs get thrown away because we are looking for the perfect egg.
Anyway, those little guys are not fenced in and can pretty much go where ever they feel like it. Some wander up by the road and do get run over occasionally. they head back to the woods and then a fox might see a snack. Population control.

They do have a coop, but quite a few of them would rather hang out around the house and lay eggs under the porch, under the bushes, in the flower garden, on a table, in the recycle bin, or j
randomly on the floor. Every spring  she is bound to see babies that just appear out of the fields and under the porch with half a dozen babies. At night the ones that don't go into the coop roost in trees instead. That does make them vulnerable to night time critters. She told me about an owl once or two that picked off a few. When an owl hits tree branches its sounds like a tree crashing into a million pieces.  Very scary.

My mom has a perfect full length porch facing the woods  so she can sit back an enjoy what nature has to offer.  flowers bloom, birds sing, see a deer or two. Its breezy and calming to stretch out on the couch... until the chickens found the couch. Usually the ones that come onto the porch are ones that were born on it.  This is Smudge, she happens to be one of the bantam hens that my son was around when she came out of the egg and he named her.

We go through this ever year. In the winter she buttons up the porch, and puts up framed plastic to protect from the wind. A handful of her chickens end up hanging out to stay out of the snow. Its keeps them from being lunch on most cases. Every spring she has to go through and pull off all the furniture and scrub down the porch to reclaim it for human use again.

The really creepy part that always gets me is when they turn around on the couch or chair and stare at us through the window. The TV is right next to the window and you can't help but get distracted. Chickens staring you down is really unnerving. Good luck sleeping after that visual.

Grand Opening for The Chicken Lady Blog

I have so many wonderful stories to share that I don't even know where to begin. I should have started this blog years ago but, as you all know life has a way of getting away from you and I was afraid of the commitment. I am still afraid of it, but what the hell.

The Chicken Lady aka my mother, is one of the most incredible women I know. She raised two kids on her own with very little to nothing. Putting her self through school, working thankless jobs to put food on the table and being the dad role model.  What started as a single trailer on a hill on a chuck of land has flourished into what is now a paradise that most people only dream of.

My blog isn't about us kids and our hardships growing up.  It's the next chapter in my mothers life. The one where the hard part is over.  When do you get to that point that you in your life that you can enjoy its simplicity?

She's surrounded by nature a on plot of land in the middle of Pure Michigan that she has called her own for over 40 years. She's made a paradise out of nothing and it's  pure serenity to get away from the fast paced life of social media, horrible news, and bad politics.

After my brother and I grew up and flew the coop my mother really started living. Living they way she wanted to live. Peaceful, simple and not answering to anyone.  Total dream right?

No credit cards, no outstanding debt, just living and sharing her life with her pets. She has multiple chickens of various breeds. Bantam chickens that roam free and do just crazy things. Geese that guard her spring fed pond. Cats and dogs that are both entertaining and purposeful when wild life comes creeping up for a snack.

When you're not caught up in dead end job spending more time at work than with family. She's artsy fartsy with wood crafts made out of recycled lumber, she designed hand bags and tote bags made from up-cycled juice bags and animal feed bags, sells crafty items on Etsy and Ebay and not to mention her mad skills with a chain saw cutting down trees the young age of 68.  I don't mess with my mom!

My goal is to share tidbits of her relaxed often humorous world so you can live vicariously through her. Enjoy

Bucket of Chicken?